Donate Life Wisconsin

STORIES OF HOPE

Phyllis’ Story

Lovingly submitted by Phyllis' husband, Jim

Phyllis and I were enormously blessed with over 50 years of marriage. Through our loving partnership we were fortunate to have four marvelous children (two sons, two daughters). Phyllis was not only my best friend but the love of my life. She was the sweetheart of my soul. She was the most giving person I have ever known. She would do anything for anybody at anytime or place.

Phyllis was an amazing woman. She had an understated, wry sense of humor. We were out celebrating our 20th anniversary when I told her that once we reached our 25th, she would be off “probation.” She smiled and said she would remember that remark. Upon our 25th anniversary celebration, she announced to the gathered group that she was off “probation,” but that Jim is now on, for the next 25 years! When we celebrated our 50th anniversary, she kindly “removed” me from probation. She then said “Let’s go for 75 – the first 50 were a piece of cake.”

When our kids finished high school, Phyllis went back to school herself to become a registered nurse; graduating at age 40. She went to work at a local hospital as a staff nurse where she stayed for 20 years. She retired only because of severe back problems which required surgery. She missed nursing very much. She was truly a patient advocate and carried this into volunteer work with a local senior center.

Phyllis and I always discussed things openly and frankly; including death. We had an excellent rapport when it came to decision making and truly felt the same about what to do when that horrible day would come for either of us. Our kids knew our wishes as well, so there was clarity on what had to be done when that fateful day would occur. We always kept our estate plan up-to-date, including the advanced directives for healthcare. We always felt because we had been blessed our whole lives, we did not want to linger in a state of vegetation as the quality of our lives was more important than the length. We also agreed that if the opportunity presented itself, we wished to be organ and tissue donors. We wanted to donate to someone so their lives could be saved or enhanced through organ and tissue transplantation.

Phyllis was taken from us suddenly and unexpectedly in February 2007 when she died of a cerebral aneurysm. Her health had been reasonably good and she was in good spirits when I left home to do my thing at the YMCA. In fact, we were kidding each other as to whose turn it was to go grocery shopping. As we often did, we decided we would go together upon my return in about an hour. Within 45 minutes of my departure, I received a phone call from Phyllis’ friend. She told me Phyllis had dropped the phone during their conversation. Her friend called 911 and then called me. I rushed home to find EMS had been there and left. I had to call 911 to find out what hospital she was at, rushed over and found her to be on a ventilator and was told she was brain-dead. I contacted our kids, including one on the West Coast and one on the East Coast, as well as her sisters. She was surrounded by her family when life support was removed. They were able to recover bone and connective tissue, that I hope can be used to improve someone’s life – I know she would be very pleased and happy to know she was continuing her giving ways.

Brian's Story

We all like to think that we would live till we are old and gray. Little do we know how fragile that perception is.

Brian, our amazing middle child, was a blue-eyed wonder, with crazy hairstyles and a smirky smile. He was always in motion and testing the limits of every aspect of his life. He charmed everyone he met. Being only 23, Brian had no reason to think about his life ending. He was just getting started on his version of taking the world by the tail. A junior at MSOE, majoring in Electrical Engineering, he had his own part-time business known as PMS (Property Maintenance Service) and was preparing to close on his first income property.

Our family’s life as we knew it was forever changed on Monday October 6th, 2003. It was a beautiful sunny autumn day. Brian was on his way home from MSOE. He was entering the expressway at 6th and McKinley, where he lost control of his motorcycle. He was thrown from his bike and sustained major trauma to his head.

He arrived at the hospital unconscious, where he remained in a coma for two weeks. Seeing his unmarked body motionless seemed so unnatural. We felt helpless. There was nothing we could do. This couldn’t be happening; Brian was always the strong and fearless one, ready for any challenge.

When it was apparent that the outcome was not good and Brian was not going to recover, we discussed the idea of organ donation. Never having discussed this with Brian and not knowing if he had signed his driver’s license which we did not have, we made the choice. Brian was going to die; nothing was going to change that. While we were in our darkest hour, our choice to donate sustained us through our son’s tragic end. We chose to let adversity transform Brian’s life into something greater. Having him be a donor provided a positive outcome that honored the life he lived.

On Monday evening October 20th, Brian became a hero, giving another chance at life to three people he never knew. Brian had embraced life, living it to the fullest with no regrets. We believe he would have no regrets about the decision we made, knowing he was able to help others to live their lives to the fullest.

Because of our limited knowledge of donation we chose only to donate Brian’s organs. Although that was a significant gift, so many others could have been helped had we been more familiar with the donation process. We would have given his tissue and bone marrow as well.

Most people would like to believe that their existence if the world has made a difference, and when they are gone in some small way they have left their mark. I believe Brian has left his mark on those who are touched by his life; his story and his organ donation. He made a difference in the lives of three people who have renewed life, thanks to his donation.

Life is not measured by what we get, but by what we become.

We make a life by what we give.

Lovingly submitted by his mother, Lynn Baudo.

Dustin's Story

Dustin’s choice to be an organ donor sent his family on a mission to open their hearts to accept and give support to other donor families.

“Dustin’s life bore a great example of his exceptional drive, winning smile and heart,” shares Dustin’s mom, Mary Jo. Dustin, age 23, died from injuries he received in a traffic accident in June of 2005. Dustin’s live-saving gifts included the donation of his heart, liver, pancreas, kidneys and corneas. Through his gifts, Dustin changed the lives of four organ recipients, multiple tissue recipients and hundreds more through the recipient’s family and friends. His choice to be an organ donor sent his family on a mission to open their hearts to accept and give support to other donor families.

“He seemed to know everyone and everyone him knew him as a hard-working, car-loving, adventurous man whose quick, witty remarks brought laughter and ease,” adds Mary Jo.

Extremely motivated, bright and successful, Dustin was strong and healthy. He enjoyed participating in sports and exercising. Driven to succeed, Dustin started his own car audio business at the age of 16. He graduated from Black River Falls High School in 2001 and from Western Technical College in 2005. Dustin worked a professional job as a CNC machinist and owned his own home by the age of 23. He truly lived by his signature motto, “Nothing ventured, nothing gained.”

“Dustin had boundless energy and a heart full of love,” says Mary Jo. “He was always willing to help, support and give his all where his friends and loved ones were concerned. His love and laughter brightened our world.”

Dustin’s choice to be an organ donor sent his family on a mission to open their hearts to accept and give support. Mary Jo and Donna, Dustin’s liver recipient, have shared their story of hope and healing at public events. They know that their experience and new-found friendship will have a powerful effect on others.

“Hope and peace are separate from grief,” adds Mary Jo. “Life grows because of Dustin’s influence and gift to others.” .